Monstrous Ear Ache.

I don't know if I have ever actually told you about my job. It is mindnumbing work and I keep telling people that if it weren't for my access to the internet, I would be regressing. This, however, is not the reason I am posting.
I work with all kinds of people, which is expected. I, however cannot stand cry babies especially if these cry babies are men. There is this guy who works with us who just goes out of his way to piss me off. I don't want to sound mean but when I get sick I stay home or I come to work and deal with it without whining. Some time back this guy, let's call him SK came to work sick and made a big deal out of it, it seems all he had was a headache but I would be forgiven for thinking he had ebola. If anyone asked him for anything he would say, "can't you see I am sick?" Since I have never been one to enable anyone I told him if he was too sick to work he should have stayed home. This wasn't the worst of it though. The past couple of days he has had an ear ache, his ear is hurting. So yesterday he is standing two feet away from something he doesn't want to get up and pick up so do you know what he says to me when I tell him to get up and do it himself? He says, and I quote, "No, you help me. Don't you know my ear is paining?" I thought I had heard wrong, I was thinking you little motherfucking wanker!! I was at a loss for words, I mean seriously people what do you say to something like that? "Oh poor baby, your ear? You can't possibly do anything because your ear is just getting in the way of a sound mind. Sit back, relax, let me take care of it for you. God forbid you actually had something seriously wrong with you, we woul dnot know how to handle that but an ear, well that is just my specialty, today is your lucky day." I wanted to pummel him preferably his knees so that he would actually have something to complain about and an actual reason not to stand up.
Enough ranting. I gotta get back to work.

50.

No, not fity cent and if you don't have a speech impediment, fifty cent. I just realised this is my 50th post yet I have been blogging since November 2004. I am mostly a very lazy writer but having access to a PC with internet all the time has helped me improve.
Remember my tentative plans for the weekend, I didn't do any of the things I said I might do. My boss kept me here late on Saturday so I didn't go watch goats race and I din't go to Jinja for my much needed weekend get away. In short, my weekend sucked; hard.
I am back at work, not refreshed at all after my one day off a week. Will post when I have something to say.

Of things.

So some unreliable sources tell me that the lady in Mafikizolo is sick and other also unreliable sources say she is pregnant; both sources agree that they probably won't make it down here for their show scheduled for Saturday. Some more reliable sources tell me that J. Kazoora, the man behind the show is leaving the country today. As a result of these bits of disturbing news, it looks like I won't be watching the show with my Mom and Alfie anytime soon or... at all. I guess I will have to arrange a conventional meet-the-parents type thing. This is hard because there is no distractions in case there are uncomfortable silences. Alfie, I know you are reading this so, don't worry, I will work something out.
Since I am not going to watch the show I have made other plans. I am going to the Royal Ascot Goat Race on Saturday with Alfie without my mother. We are then going to Jinja for the weekend where I hope to bungee jump. These plans are tentative so if I come back here on Monday and say I did none of these things do not, I repeat, DO NOT BE SURPRISED!!!
I have just come back from a wonderful lunch. Alfie came (late) picked me up and took me for lunch. Let me divert from the topic at hand for a moment. I am going to assume that you have all been in the first stages of a relationship, the novelty of it all is enough to make your stomach turn (in a good way) everytime you think about it. If you truly care for the person, the thought of them just makes you smile. I was chatting with Alfie online and I was smiling the whole time and the whole time I looked like an idiot coz it looked like I was smiling at myself. So I beg your permission to gush over it while I still can before the fights and the madness take over. As I was saying, it was short but wonderful and I got a present out of it: a perfume. I love perfume.
As for Savage and Dante, you asked for it. More of me means more of this puketastic delirious giddiness. You will soon be wishing for more PB and less me.

Update

The last time I posted, like really posted was Saturday and I was excitedly waiting to watch Mafikizolo with Alfie and my Mom. Those of you in the know know that Mafikizolo missed their flight and thus there was no show thus no meeting between Alfie and The Mother (this is how I shall refer to her, real name Phoebe). So anyway, The Red Pepper broke the story and since they have a history of making stuff up I chose not to believe. Seriously, those Pepper guys said some girl died in the Tsunami and I met her about three Thursdays ago, far from dead. I went to the saloon to get my hair did and then I call my friend and she tells me she went to get advance tickets and the guy said the show was cancelled. I listen to Kazoora, who was the guy in charge, and he says, on his radio programme, that they will be here this week and the show will be there this Saturday. I am excitedly waiting once again.

On Sunday, I went and visited my old primary school, Kitante Primary School. I hadn't been there in 10, count them, TEN years. Jay, you were right. I felt enormous. I remember the school being bigger. I loved it, I loved being there, they were some of the best years of my life. It was surreal being back there.

Monday, came to work, had the worst case of the blues, came to work on Tuesday, same old, same old and now it's Wednesday. Savage, this should suffice as an update on me.

P.s. I know I promised not to bore you with my giddy, ecstatic state of mind but I am sorry, I lied. I am so happy right now. More later.

Prison Break.

For those of you who don't know it already, I am a die hard Prison Break fan which should explain why I have up the videos I got of Google videos. Enjoy. I can't wait to see the new season.

Prison Break Season 2 Premiere Clip

The hunt is on...will Michael out-maneuver Bellick again? Prison Break Season 2 Premieres Monday August 21, 8/7c, only on FOX!

Wentworth Miller Interview - Prison Break Season 2

Catch an interview with Wentworth Miller discussing Season 2 of Prison Break! Prison Break Season 2 Premieres Monday August 21, 8/7c, only on FOX!

Dominic Purcell Interview- Prison Break Season 2

Catch an interview with Dominic Purcell of Prison Break! Prison Break Season 2 Premieres Monday August 21, 8/7c, only on FOX!

Off the Market

I am officially off the market, we are talking dating wise. I have a boyfriend. I didn't go looking for him but he just sorta fell into my laps, not literally. Yes people, you can now stop pining over me. I am gone and very happy. Now, I know how irritating new couples can be, what with name dropping every few seconds and general puke inducing sweet stories of their amazing first days so I will spare you but I must announce to the world, I LOVE HIM.

In other news, I am planning on watching Mafikizolo tonight. Alfie is taking my mother and I and I can't wait, I love them but I am hearing some disturbing news that they didn't make their flight or didn't get off the plane, I refuse to believe this coz it would be totally bad karma. The first time my boyfriend meets my Mom and it all gets fucked up, so I am praying and keeping my fingers crossed that she likes him even if there is no show.

Otherwise, my life is generally uninteresting for the reading masses though I am having a whale of a time.

See y'all around.

Saturday.

I am back at my desk after yet another very short weekend, infact I refuse to call it a weekend, let me call it a day off. I went out on Saturday and I don't think I have ever had so much fun. I was supposed to watch 'Pirates of the Caribean' with my as if date of Thursday, let's call him A. So in keeping with his character, he kept me waiting, again. I like him so I wait. Anyway, he comes late and we can't get in, this is ok because I am watching today, not with him, so I believe I will make it, can't wait. Instead of watching the movie, A and I talked and talked like I haven't talked to anyone in a while and I must say, I hope this turns into something. The ladder theory has totally jaded me though so I am being realistic about this. My clan came out on Saturday as well and we relocated to Le Rouge, which I love. I had so much fun. We got home at 4.00am and both my parents weren't back yet, they got back half an hour after us. They were also having their own night out.
I spent the better part of Sunday in bed and now I am back here slaving away.

Trauma

While I was out last night I remembered an incident that happened when I was seven, actually two incidents.
I was in Kitante Primary School and I loved every minute of it. When I was in P.2, I decided to walk home with some of my friends one day. It was a long walk and by the time I got home I was exhausted. I just fell on the doorstep and my mother came and gatherd me up, hydrated me and told me my father was going to kill me because he went to pick me up and I wasn't there, what was I thinking, didn't I know how worried he would be? I didn't, I was seven. I forgot to tell you, I walked in the first place because he was late. Being the seven year old I was I got into bed at 4.00pm in the afternoon and put the bars up on my lower decker of our doulble decker bed thinking it would protect me from my father's wrath. It didn't. He came home, woke me up and beat me.
The next term he was late again, this time I didn't dare walk so I waited and waited and waited and he didn't show. I was devastated and scared but I was not going to walk home again so I stayed put. It got dark and I was alone in th lower school waiting shed. An angel of a man who worked in our canteen and stayed in a modified container close to it invited to stay the night with him. He was so nice. He prepared fish for supper and I have to say, since that day I have not been able to eat fish. I slept in his bed and he played the radio to help me sleep. I think about it now and I thank he wasn't a murdering paedophile because I would be dead. Apparently my parents got their signals mixed up; my mom knew my dad was getting me and he thought she was getting me, he got home at about 10.00pm and since there were no mobile phones in that age they both found out I was MIA at about the time he got home without me. I am told he came to school found the gate closed and passed under it and looked for me but couldn't find me. My poor mother was inconsolabe, she was certain I was dead and could not forgive my father for killing her first born. My father came back to the school in the morning and the nice man, whose name I don't know, woke me up and told me to go home. As we drove by the lower school I could see some of my friends lining up for assembly. My father being the stoic man that he is took me home, I showered changed and went back to school. You would think the traumatic experience would atleast buy me a sick day, but no.
Can of you guys beat that?

I wasn't stood up.

Thank God, my faith in men is restored but it was put to the test before it could fully return to me. My as if blind date was supposed to pick me from work at 6.00 then he called and said he would be 30 minutes late; I told him to find me at the Shell select in Bugolobi. I went there and waited then he called and asked for another 30 minutes. Now normally this would have really pissed me off but luckily for him I just started a new book, The Autograph Man by Zadie Smith, and I can read for hours and not notice the time. Eventually he shows up and tells me I am going to have to wait another 30 minutes, I say I rather wait at Nandos where I usually have my coffee after work. I know, why did I wait, why was I being so nice? I must confess, it was because he is so cute, seriously, if he had been bad looking I would have dumped like a hot potato but he wasn't, he was cute. If you are thinking I am shallow, I guess I am. Anyway, I wait with my book and he comes back after a while all looking nice coz he had passed by a barber while waiting for whatever he was waiting for. He totally made up for making me wait so long by being so attentive the whole night and still etting me roam Steak Out like the nomad I am.
So my faith in men is restored even after taking a few beatings.

Dumber and Dumberer

The title of this post adequately describes the state of mind I seem to be perpetually in these days, as can be evidenced in my most recent post. Chalk it down to my undying faith in the human spirit but I agreed t have lunch with the office guy again. I know. Anyway, this time I out and told him I want fries, a sandwich and a bottle of water from the Shell, today, he sends his driver to pick me up and, lo and behold, we make our way back to the kafunda. I was wiser coz this time I was dressed appropriately, expecting this from him.
The food is good, no doubt about it, but seriously I give up on free lunches.

No more secrets!

With my last post, now the blogsphere knows all there is to know about me, how I look and sound so there is no more mystery. I sound ditzy in that video so my secret is out, I am not as smart as I sound when I am writing. Don't hate me, keep visiting my blog, please. :(

So after the last episode where I was stood up, I seem to have not learnt anything because I went ahead to set up another as if blind date with some guy for later today. Savage, I won't be late this time. If I am stood up I will never again meet anyone I don't know. They say 'once bitten, twice shy', I agree. So wish me luck. I must say though, that this is not exactly a date, we both happen to go for Rock Night on Thursday so we just agreed to meet up today and say hi, you know, put a face and voice to the faceless, voiceless online conversations. (Jay, it's not you, no pressure.)

Aren't I The Most Beautiful Girl You've Ever Seen?

I went for the most beautiful wedding on Saturday, Raymond's sister was getting married and it was by far the best wedding I have ever gone for. The colour scheme was blue and white and it really looked like a summer wedding despite the showers that tried to mess up things. They, however, did not stop the festivities, and they were festive. I have never seen two people happier to be married, both the bride and groom were smiling throughout the party and they both looked genuinely happy. I wish them a long and wonderful marriage.

Dreams.

I don't mean like aspirations and stuff, I mean, the go to bed, toss and turn kind of dreams. I have them alot but they are usually varations of movies I have seen recently or not so recently but they are never mundane or ordinary.

Once I dreamt that I was being pursued by the FBI and I was being driven around by my friend then she dropped me off in some deserted town with a shell of a building where I reenacted scenes from Minority Report.

Another time I dreamt that my room mate, one of the quietest people you will ever meet was a version of Trinity and she saved all of us (my friends and our husbands) from blood thirsty terrorists; that was funny.

Last night was another in this series, except this time, there were actually actors, the lead was the guy in Cellular, (I forget his name), and there were also some other people. Anyway, there was a ship and a huge wave and the Cellular guy saved our lives. I know what you are thinking, alot like Poseidon, so did I when I woke up. Once I thought of writing them all down so I could actually get a screenplay from them but I worried that I would be accused of pledgerism (I could always say I had internalised the movies).

The night before last, though, I had a very wierd dream. I was pregnant but I had a small tummy, I went to the loo to pee and my water broke, I remember so vividly how it felt, like a tank bursting open and water gushing out of it, anyway, I had to find my mom who was far away and on my way there I told anyone who cared to listen that my water had broken and they all insisted that I wasn't, infact, pregnant. I found my mom, went to the doctor and he told me I had already given birth. Wierd, huh!?!

See y'all tonight at Steak Out for yet another Rock Night, especially you, Jay.

You Win!!

I changed my password and for the imposter, it's a special salute to you. I wasn't going to but Ivan made me.

@ THE REAL DARLKOM

To the real Darlkom:
One word; change your password!